3 Things...

So tonight I was asked “For what three things would you like to be remembered?” It’s a question I have often thought of, but for which I never settled on an answer. Well, to answer the person who asked I had two out of three:

1. That people would not just label me as a “Christian” because of my religious beliefs but because of my lifestyle – that there’d be enough evidence to prove my love for Christ by the people He touched through me.

2. As selfish as I feel saying it, that I make some sort of name for myself in the fashion industry, though it’ll all be His doing and I’ll give Him full credit as I already do…

But #3 just didn’t come to mind in the moment. I’ve learned that some things, often some of the best, wait until the dead of night to come to mind. Or maybe I’m just a night owl. Anyway, I was headed to finish a good book and go to sleep around 2:30 am but just couldn’t do it. Instead I stayed downstairs, finished the book, and fell asleep on the couch while contemplating the book and what my future may hold. When I woke up around 3:45 am I slumped upstairs only to crawl into bed for the night still feeling like something was unfinished. Well, after turning out the lights at 3:59, I laughed that earlier I felt like I wouldn’t be asleep by 4 and laid down. That’s when it hit me…

3. I want to be known for stories. Story is what has always attracted me and what I’ve always longed for. So I want people to know that I loved hearing stories, that I lived a great story, and that I told stories. Especially that first and forever story of how Christ changed and continues to change my life!

I hope that’s what I’m doing here. And I hope you tell your story, because believe you me, it longs to be heard!!

P.S. It’s 4:25 am now, but I think it was worth it. ;)

Day 7 of Holy Week: Epectations & Encounters

It's Easter! And He is Risen! Indeed!!

And... I was distracted again today. But at least I figured out what it is that's really got me unfocused - today I realized that both on Friday and this morning I was waiting to experience Him so I knew I would have something great to write about! Have you ever diminished the experience of something by anticipating it? Like you fill your head and your heart with so much expectation that when the event happens you feel like saying, "That was it...?" That's sort of what happened this weekend. I had such high hopes for a big revelation, that my heart and mind were not prepared to accept anything less. So, though Pastor Z's messages were revelatory, I think my mind wanted more. It reminds me of that verse in 1 Corinthians: "Since God in His infinite wisdom saw to it that the world would never know Him through human wisdom, He has used our foolish preaching to save those who believe." - 1 Cor. 1:21 (NLT).

Anyway, Pastor did have a great message this morning. He spoke about the power and significance of personal experience over knowledge. The example he gave was Krispy Kreme donuts... There is a lot of information out there about their company, about their baking process, and about their donuts. But they do not make donuts for us to just learn about them and have a head full of knowledge about Krispy Kreme and their donuts. They make donuts for us to experience them; they want us to encounter the deliciousness of their donuts. Christ is the same - He did not rise from the dead and leave the Holy Spirit with us just so we would read His Word and follow His rules. He wants us to experience Him, to encounter the Resurrection power! And what a mighty, saving, and gracious power it is!!

Day 6 of Holy Week: The Day Between...

It's the day between, the interim... And with what happened last night and what happened that first "Good Friday," I keep coming back to an amazing song by BarlowGirl. In it they proclaim that He is always with us, that we can trust His Word, even when we do not feel His presence! If you've never heard it, or even if you have, you should watch and pay close attention to the lyrics - they're pretty powerful:

Day 5 of Holy Week: Free to Wonder

Well, it's Good Friday and I've got a lot on my mind... First of all, at the beginning of our service this evening I was thinking of what it would've been like to attend the Last Supper - would I feel free to just soak up everything Christ said as He washed my feet and spoke about His coming betrayal? Or would I be weighed down by guilt as He served and loved on me? Or would I even refuse His service thinking it too lowly a task for Him? Would I even realize what He meant about the bread & wine? Or would it just confuse and worry me? All too often I think of these events - the Last Supper and Good Friday - with the Resurrection in mind, but what if I had no idea, no guarantee that Christ was coming back? I wonder if I would realize what He meant after He died so that I could trust His word and hope to see Him again. It's easy to thank Him for His death when you already know He came back. But I think I would be confused, angry, and deeply grieved if I wasn't sure of anything by His horrifying death.

The other main thing on my mind has to do with this evening's message. Our pastor gave a great message about how Christ had to die to free us from sin and death. It was heart felt and Spirit filled, but I was apparently distracted because though I knew He was present, I didn't feel His presence and Pastor Z's words were sadly just words. I hated that I was distracted and didn't experience the evening as I longed to... At the end of the service we each hammered a nail into a worn cross that Pastor Z had made years ago. Our nail was to represent something - a habit, a sin, a past event - that Christ died to free you from. It was a powerful illustration, but as I was distracted it felt like I was going through the motions as I hit my nail with the hammer. Sure, I thought of a few things that He has freed me from or that we are working together to overcome, but I didn't feel His presence in it. I know He was there and He was working, I just wish I felt something. And then, me dwelling on that, I know, was distracting me further... And yet, I feel free! I am not weighed with guilt at being distracted, though I began to be so before we sang "Mighty to Save" and I hammered that nail in! What an awesome realization: My freedom in Christ does not depend on my mental focus or my full emotional awareness of His presence!!

P. S. I just thought, that's probably how I would react to His death without the guarantee of His resurrection - I would be distracted, confused, and unfocused, though His words should comfort me and fill me with hope... And His resurrection would not depend on my awareness of His message! Praise Him!

Day 4 of Holy Week: Fulfilled in Service

Last night instead of having a lesson the youth helped hide eggs for our annual Easter Egg Hunt with the kids department. Then we waited and watched over the kids, helping them find eggs when necessary. This was a simple task, but our teens were so gracious and helpful about it. I was impressed with how willing they were to help though they knew they didn't get any of the eggs to themselves. Yet, I am not surprised, as the more time I spend with those kids the more proud I am of them! They are such a blessing to work with!

So what I want to tell you today is that if you're a member of a church and you're not volunteering any where, you should look into serving with them. And if you have no idea which department to work with, ask two questions: ask a friend where/how they think you should serve and ask the pastor (or his assistant if he has one) about where they need volunteers. I can tell you I was pretty much thrown into the two places I volunteer, and working with the youth was both something I never thought of and a little frightening! But I jumped in and though at first I felt a little out of place, I wouldn't trade the last 2 1/2 years with them for anything. They are like my little brothers and sisters and my Wednesday evenings with them are often the highlight of my week! ;)

So, you have no reason to hold back, for you too are called to serve and answering will surely bless you!

Day 3 of Holy Week: Opinion that Matters

Today I am glad my identity is in Christ. I worked hard all day, yet when I made a silly mistake (I forgot to get colored paper out of the printer) and my boss commented on it, that's all I could think about... But later I remembered who I really work for and how forgiving He is! And I was overwhelmed with His unconditional love and grace. So if you're struggling with beating yourself up for the little things, or someone is nit-picking you about a silly error, just remember who's really in control, who's opinion really matters, and who's love covers all! And be blessed and comforted by His gracious love for you!

Day 2 of Holy Week: Phoenix Fire Back-story

So the quote from C. S. Lewis' Mere Christianity about God building you into a palace reminded me of a "Phoenix Log" I wrote a while back. This is more about claiming land than building a home, but it's a similar concept. I was thinking of using this as a back-story of sorts for Phoenix Fire in case I ever actually go further with her. Please let me know what you think!

I was born into slavery; the world with it's expectations and allowances held me captive. But, one day I met a man with a flawless escape plan. He would take my place, even though they would kill him for it, and I would gain freedom! In fact, he promised that once I accepted his help, his father would adopt me and send another helper my way. This helper came with a promise as well: he was there to assist me in conquering new land for the father's kingdom. As a child of the king, this land would also be mine!
Now, this land is no ordinary land, it is heart land - it lies within my heart and conquering it bit by bit gives me a more real sense of the freedom I received when I accepted the savior's help. Each battle seems to get bigger and bloodier than the last, but the helper is very powerful and always able to provide the courage, strength, and endurance I lack.
Sometimes it is the work after the battle that is the hardest. As we rid each heart territory of its old inhabitants I struggle to relinquish control and let things go. The helper is kind and allows me time to grieve, but always reminds me of the necessity of this work. For the king, my father, wants my whole heart. And in the long run, it is better for me to hand control to him as he will use all his resources to not only protect and maintain the land, but to heal it, nourish it, and allow it to prosper. The king is good and will only allow good things to inhabit our heart land. And these inhabitants will be there to cultivate the land so my heart will flourish!

~PF

Day 1 of Holy Week: How Many Kings

It's the first day of Holy Week and the thought of Christ coming to town on a donkey is rather humbling. As I had a semi-stressful day at work I am reminded that the Lord of lords who was present at the creation of the universe humbled Himself so significantly and I am a little convicted. This makes me think of two things: 1) I should do everything as though I do it for the Lord (Colossians 3:23), and 2) the song "How Many Kings" was introduced to me as a Christmas song, but it so fits right into Holy Week & Easter. If you've never heard it, you should check it out:

Lent, Day 40: PALM SUNDAY!

It's day 40! And it's Palm Sunday!! It was a great day at church today! We had a guest speaker - a retired pastor who attends our church. He spoke about God's call on us to love the people around us! He reminded us that when the Pharisees asked Jesus about the "greatest commandment" He gave us two - the first to love God wholeheartedly and the second to love others as we love ourselves. This unasked for command is rather important as it is how we show our love to and for God! And he ended the sermon with a great old hymn that I have to share with you.

"They'll Know We Are Christians by Our Love"
We are one in the Spirit,
we are one in the Lord,
We are one in the Spirit
we are one in the Lord,
And we pray that all unity
may one day be restored:

And they'll know we are Christians
By our love, by our love,
Yes, they'll know we are Christians
By our love.

We will walk with each other
we will walk hand in hand
we will walk with each other
we will walk hand in hand
and together we'll spread the news
that God is in our land:

And they'll know we are Christians
By our love, by our love,
Yes, they'll know we are Christians
By our love.

We will work with each other
we will work side by side
We will work with each other
We will work side by side
And we'll guard each man's dignity
and save each man's pride:

And they'll know we are Christians
By our love, by our love
Yes, they'll know we are Christians
By our love.

All Praise to the Father
from whom all things come,
And all praise to Christ Jesus
His only Son,
and all praise to the Spirit
who makes us all one:

And they'll know we are Christians
By our love, by our love
Yes, They'll know we are Christians
By our love.

Lent, Day 39: Brotherly Love

So, Saturday got the better of me... I wish I could say it was a crazy busy day, but it wasn't all that busy. We went grocery shopping, which always takes longer than I'd like. And while we were out I texted a friend who is like a brother about making him some fried plantains next weekend if he was free. Well, he surprised me by inviting himself and his roomie over as they were craving them like crazy and had already been trying to find a way to make some. So we quickly finished our shopping, adding a couple extra burgers to our cart, and raced home to tidy up before Frank arrived. It was late by the time we got home, but even later, like around 10:15-10:30 when he finally got there. I had begun to fry some plantains I bought, but I was so glad when he brought some of his own as I had no idea what to look for and bought green plantains! His were pleasantly yellow. And he, thankfully, took over the frying for me too! By the time we finished watching "Despicable Me" and they were heading home, they had bellies full of burgers and fries and a tupperware full of plantains for their dorm. And, though it added a little stress to my evening as hosting guests always does, I truly enjoyed the opportunity to be a sister to my friend! It was also great to get a dose of brotherly love in return! That's all I have to leave with today - it is such a privilege to get to love God's people, His creation! Just a reminder that the palace He's building is not just for Him, but for every kind of guest that needs love.